Unearthing Deep Roots

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Good morning from… by the brook♡
It’s just after 6am. The sun is slowly rising casting a nourishing golden glow, gently awakening it’s subjects below. The reflection of subtle ripples riding down the brook are projected upon a small tree just beyond it’s edge. And the persistent bellow of an adolescent Blue Jay begging for breakfast echoes through the moist morning air.
A quiet sense of knowing inhabits my whole being this morning. This week has brought about hours of unraveling. It’s almost inconceivable how intricate our psyche is, how innately intelligent our bodies are. The last two days I’ve spent on my knees clawing at the mud, unearthing the deep roots that directed the way, acting on my behalf for so many years. Sadness – grief – horror – anger – and fear waved in and out, each taking their turn churning my stomach, swooning my head.
It all happened so quickly, like flashes of lightening amidst a rain storm, illuminating the pummeling rain.
Then as quickly as it all rushed in, it slipped out, leaving open space, room to breath and promise of safety and hope of deep intimate connections- Above all… conclusively the truth.
I can still see her just out of my reach. She is crying, so scared and feeling alone. Captive within her constructed wall of worriment, searching for safety. My heart ripping into tiny pieces, as I can feel every ounce of her unprocessed pain. Part of me wants to reach my hand out to her, “I can help you, grab ahold,” But the other part so afraid she will pull me back in. Closing my eyes and bowing my head, I honor this moment for what it is. A traversing in time, shifting from sealed off into spaciousness- a building of trust within.
As I am writing this to you, a Blue Heron is flying by and he has landed in the tree just past the sight line of my patio. He always seems to visit at just the right moment.
I trust that the sun will rise each morning, that rain will fall, birds will fly, the bee will sting, and the wind will blow.
That leaves are green, then orange, yellow & red, and eventually brown.
I trust that the dark night will always invite the moon and millions of stars. And fireflies will light the way as the deer lay down and close their eyes.
I trust that who ever needs to read this will receive it well within their heart.
Sending you my love and a wish for open, spacious skies♡
Maureen♡xo

Why Don’t You Leave Well Enough Alone?

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Why do you keep pushing yourself?
Why don’t you leave Well Enough alone?
Facebook Memories- run-Disney♡
This was my inspiration to begin running- to wear a tutu and a tiara in a Disney Princess race at my favorite place on earth… (besides the woods). I gained so much more than a couple beautiful medals, new friendships and memories that fill my heart.
Running became a physical outlet and a funnel for my frantic unresolved energy. As I pushed through uncomfortable physical challenges, I built strength and power to move through emotional barriers. This race and running became the support I needed and used seven years ago when life shifted into a difficult, confusing season.
Any and every insecurity, unhealed emotion, ignored desires, disregarded sadness, pressed down anger… bubbled up at once. It was a cyclone of shit spewed into the air and it fell onto an unsteady foundation like a deck of cards tossed up and recklessly scattered about.
Seven years of reading books, seeking information, speaking with coaches and counselors, meditating, moving, and praying, to peal back layers of emotions to uncover patterns of behavior to unlock the door that I was hiding behind.
Seven years later I am standing in a similar space but with so much more knowledge and a full tool bag. Might this be a mid-life crisis or maybe the dark night of the soul? I’m not sure. But I know these valleys are meant for growth and to catapult us to the next level, higher ground.
Going inward is not fun, it’s not easy. Then why do it?
A close friend once asked me in complete agitation, “Why do you keep tormenting yourself?”
The answer is, to get to the other side. I don’t want to stay small, hiding and fearful of life. I want to meet each day with confidence, courage, and curiosity. I want to find the authentic me that’s beneath all the layers that I’ve built for protection, because now they are just holding me back.
Finding balance through these seasons is difficult, to identify practices that keep you focused on healing and moving through. To understand how to navigate deep waters without drowning or speeding right by. It’s learning grace, patience, and space for yourself. It’s about understanding how your mind and body operate in all situations, listening- hearing, and feeling.
I don’t have it all figured out, but I’m moving in the right direction.
If you find yourself in a similar space, I’m rooting for you! And if you need support, I’m here for that too♡
Run your own race… at your own pace.
Find something that challenges you to help build your inner power.
Sending you so much love♡
Maureen xo

Always In A State of Becoming

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Good morning from… by the brook♡
Though the heat seems to have slowed my mind and body, my sweet ducks are alive and active as ever. This time of the season they congregate together, playfully splashing about in the brook, vigorously grooming themselves, poking at one another to claim their small square of standing space. There is an abundance of duck down tossed about, riding streams of air and softly landing amongst the brown hay where there was once soft strands of grass not so long ago. Mama Deer and her baby have passed through a few times since we last spoke. Their quiet, enchanting charm always thrilling me. Last evening I noticed a duck perched closely at the edge of the brook. It struck me odd, as all the others were wildly scattering about my patio hoping to receive yet more tossed delicious bits. I slowly drew near to her and noticing she was injured. It appeared her left leg was bothering her and she was very reluctant to move as she must have been in a good amount of pain. I kept watch on her as the night sky darkened, and when the rest took flight, she did not. I once again went closer to her, hoping not to frighten her, and it seemed as if she was not able to fly. She snuggled into a tight ball and there she stayed in the calm silence of the night. She wasn’t there this morning and I pray she regained her mobility and is amongst the rest standing before me this morning ♡
I hear the high pitched thrill of a hawk close by and it sets my body in a heightened state. I know the circle of life must continue to turn in order for life to continue to breathe… but it still aches my heart, pulling my breath straight out of my lungs and replacing it with dreaded dismay. Nature, always flowing, always changing. She is so wise, understanding how life can never remain stagnant; but always in a state of becoming. It’s where I find myself a lot of the time and I wonder, will there ever be a cycle of contented permanence. Though as I release these thoughts into the ethers, I know deep within this is not where I truly want to be; rather to embrace my constant evolution of becoming. To allow the seasons to flow through me. Bringing in light and darkness, highs and lows, sadness and joy.
May you allow the flow of life to root you deep and rise you up and into all the places you need to go for the becoming.♡
Sending my love♡
Maureen

Balance in Stillness

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Good morning from… by the brook♡
This week has moved through so quickly, leaving my mind and body to feel like a freight train powering through the land with very few stops for refueling. How very fitting that I am coming to understand the masculine & feminine qualities that govern our thoughts and actions. Not male & female- rather in terms of nature. Nature keeps her balance knowing what she needs to thrive. She knows when to bring through a storm and when to lay still.
My willingness to be still this morning, invited Mama Deer and her fawn up close to my patio. She was as startled as I. To be so close to another creature vibrating with life becomes a full body experience. The lungs fill with breath, the heart explodes with gratitude, the mind with wonder, the eyes with absolute, pure love.
Stillness, how nourishing. Rest, an invitation for creative awe to wash over your whole being. May you find yourself in a space of stillness this weekend. Invite your femininity in, allow it to show you how stillness can enliven every cell of your body.

The Nature of a Weed

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Good afternoon from… by the brook♡
The soft glow of morning has given way to the rhythmical song of cicadas. The air is moist and a bit oppressive; it lays heavy on my eyelids forcing them to slowly close, tricking my body into a state of rest. The midsummer sun has stripped the grass of its deep vibrancy, leaving behind brittle blades that scratch the souls of my feet. The brook’s bed is yet more exposed than the last time I wrote to you and the duck’s rather enjoy the multitude of perches now available to them. Fifteen regulars have become rather ravenous, wanting more than their fair share of feed. Just this morning I finally got an up-close glimpse of Mama Deer and her fawn♡ It was 6am; the sun had barely crested the horizon as I was serving my sweet ducks their first meal of the day. I heard a splash; thinking it was just their skittish silliness. My eyes still not yet fully focused, I hadn’t noticed the presence of Mama and baby. When our eyes met she stood still, assessing my intention, then slowly turned and walked without worry through the stone filled water with baby tightly behind.
I then sat back amongst the patio pillows to take in the newness of the day, my eyes focused on the lone dandelion growing through the brittle blades. How does something so small have such resilience, so simple have such brilliance? It’s desire to push through all that doesn’t nourish it and stand tall in its beautiful, bright color. Some may see it as it’s labeled, a weed. I see its strength and resilient nature to thrive and be just as it is. An imperfectly, beautiful expression of Self♡

Focused Thoughts~ Commitment to Self & Finding Your Voice

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Moving into this week continuing focus on Committing to Self, unearthing your authentic voice.
I would like to introduce the concept of curiosity of what your true voice, the vibration of your thoughts and feelings that live at your core is compromised of.
Do your thoughts, words, and actions live more in a moving forward with purpose mode? Logical- linear- assertive- achieving- doing? Or do they flow with a creative pulse that awakens your body and mind allowing you to draw from your emotional intellect?
Our daily lives are usually centered around movement with purpose. This is considered a more masculine type of energy, and it’s important. We need this energy to function in our jobs, to keep life in order for ourselves and our families.
But because we live in a world that demands such high expectations, we tend to forget to balance ourselves with the beautiful feminine voice within. She knows the importance of self-care and she practices the art of allowing. She moves into her body to feel and express… to create.
As you move through your day, bring your attention to how you express your energy. Be curious, not judgmental. Grace, love, acceptance are important parts of bringing forth your beautiful feminine parts and pieces.
They help you to align with, Wonderfully, Beautifully You♡
Sending my love and an invitation to fly free♡

Finding Your Voice through Your Feminine Power

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So much of our passion flows through our femininity. 

As women we are wild and raw, creative and courageous, strong, enthusiastic, empathetic spiritual beings. We were created this way. When we allow our femininity to emerge, so does the truth of our voice.

This week’s mantra- “I honor my commitment to Self to find my True Voice” has deeply stirred my spirit.  A few days after writing this, I had a nourishing conversation that brought me to the realization that I have politely tucked my femininity away. It always amazes me how much wisdom our subconscious mind and feeling bodies carry, as it was speaking to me through my own words that I shared with you.

I’m not sure of the exact date and time that I quietly, and unconsciously hid my femininity away, but I have come to realize I have been doing this my whole life. There are so many reasons that we allow our feminine fire to slowly burn out; disconnected relationships, shame, childhood issues, pregnancy, to name a few.

Disconnecting from our innate wild and raw femininity not only restrains our voice, but our entire body- mind- spirit connection.

I ask you this, do you have permission to express all of who you are as a beautiful, spiritual, and physical wild woman? Summon your wild wisdom. Root down to rise up. Connect to the rhythm of your heart. Dig deep through the stillness; dance as you let out a howl- your true voice.

Fly Free, xxoo

 

Listen for the Song of Your Soul

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Good morning from… by the brook♡
There was quite a stir this morning which gave me a bit of a scare. Mama number 3 and her 5 littles were enjoying a leisurely swim, staying tightly woven together like a small raft slowly floating from here to there. As I looked down at my notepad, I heard a loud swish! Looking up, four littles had quickly shot across the water into the shallow area and Mama had flown ashore. I quickly stood up, as I only counted 4 littles. “Where is number 5,” I kept repeating out loud. Mama quickly waddled back toward the brook from where she had flown, she was looking for Little number 5. I scanned the water afraid of what I might see; there has been a large snapping turtle frequenting this space. Moments later Little number 5 came waddling up the Brook’s bank. Thank goodness♡
I love the mornings that I am able to sit and write to you. These are the mornings that life is moving at a calmer pace. When I can clearly hear the soothing sounds of creation, not only outside my window and down by the brook, but also within. The beating of my heart, the rhythm of my breath as it moves into my body and then out again. These are the mornings that I can most clearly hear the song of my soul. It becomes difficult to sort out what internal feelings are mine versus all the external action around me. It becomes an overload for the nervous system the senses become so heightened they tune out the quiet beauty and joy of everyday. So today I celebrate the calm of this morning and that Little number 5 is safely ashore♡
May you find some calm and quiet today so you can clearly hear the song of your soul♡
Sending my love, as always,
Maureen♡

The Uncomfortable Truth About Self-Compassion

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Let’s talk… about the uncomfortable truth of Self-Compassion.

Your best friend calls you on the phone; she is  crying. “I don’t know what has come over me today,” her voice filled with anguish. “I ate a chocolate doughnut with extra frosting, lost my temper with the kids, blew off my workout at the gym, and now I just told my husband that I can’t stand looking at his face!” She bursts into tears once again.

Your heart hurts for her, as you do your best to console her. You know she has been dealing with a lot of personal issues lately and she isn’t allowing herself the time and space to heal.

Most people find it easier to be compassionate toward others rather than themselves.

It’s a natural human desire to want to relieve the suffering of another human. But in order give compassion, we must first have the awareness and ability to give it to ourselves. Compassion is defined as a “Shared Feeling , a level of sympathy so deep that it inspires action to alleviate another’s pain, sorrow or suffering.” We must firstly be able to connect to our own suffering, to feel our own discomforts and then take action to soothe our personal pain in a healthy way. 

How do I learn to be Self-Compassionate?

In yogic traditions there is a practice called Ahimsa which means non-violence. This not only refers to physical action but also thoughts and words toward one’s self, others, and all living creatures. This principle reminds us of the importance of self-compassion

Creating space for ourselves is an important part of learning to be self-compassionate- The first step in showing yourself compassion is to make space in your day to just be in your own thoughts, to be with yourself in the present moment. Not thoughts of yesterday or two minutes ago or in an hour… just right now. Be aware of your body and its sensations and emotional feelings. Allow your physical and emotional needs to be important, heard, and seen by YOU. This is where Self-Compassion starts- the acknowledgement of Self. Learning how to soothe and heal your pain is the next step, but for now acknowledging the truth of how you feel is key.

Here is the Uncomfortable Truth About Offering Compassion.

Another yogic practice is Seva, meaning selfless service. This asks us to serve others with a mindset of expecting nothing in return and having no expectations regarding the outcome.

The ability to offer compassion to alleviate another’s suffering is a beautiful picture of a human act of love. Even more so when the action is aligned with a pure intention. There is the saying, “If you want to change the world, you have to start with yourself first.”

At the deepest level- at my core, what is my intention?

My ideas of compassion have led me into difficult situations, some life altering. For me, compassion  meant not saying No. On the surface level, I was afraid to hurt someone’s feelings, felt selfish, or I felt a sense of pity for them. My “compassion” was not coming from a place of pure intention rather from a deeper source of pain that I had not healed yet. Sometimes I wanted to feel needed, purposeful. Sometimes it was easier to offer others words of healing and encouragement rather than look at my own issues.

It’s really unnerving to ask ourselves questions that may uncover a deeper truth.

When you offer compassion, is it coming from a shared feeling (not just an experience) in which you have connected to within yourself and taken healthy actions to soothe? The hard question is, are you offering compassion as a means to distract yourself from your own internal suffering, to feel a false sense of healing through another, or maybe to find a sense of worthiness? 

Like I mentioned above, these are really difficult questions to ask, because what if the answer is… yes?

If this is true for you, firstly, do not get down on yourself; you are in good company. The good news is you are now aware of your need for compassion too. Taking the uncomfortable journey inward to feel in order to heal is the most loving act we can take for ourselves and then secondly for others. Remember compassion is not something you have to search for outside of yourself, it already lives inside of you at your deepest core. 

What is one thing that you can begin to do to show yourself… Self-Compassion?

Sending my love~ Maureen

Deep Discoveries

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Good morning from… by the brook♡
“The real discovery lies not in discovering new lands, but in seeing with new eyes.”
How often do we long to be somewhere other than where we are? Maybe the beach, in the mountains, at Disney World ( I love♡ Mickey Mouse.) Maybe even completely moving the entire contents of our life to a brand new location for the feeling a new space brings; one that holds no knowledge of the past and begins right now… in the present.
I have learned through some difficult life experiences, that a new space, while maybe beneficial for a momentary venture, only distracts from deep discoveries. The biggest, bravest discovery is standing still… right where you are, and allowing the unearthing to begin. But this time, from a different view. One with curiosity, forgiveness, non-judgment, kindness… love.
I know that words can be so much easier than the actions needed to do such difficult a task, so I send you my love and support from afar♡ Please know, I am closer than you think, just a message away… if you should need a hand to hold and an ear to listen.
Sending my love,
Maureen